Episode 18: Barbie (2023)
How can people navigate the “friendzone”? Do men need romantic relationships more than women do? Does confusion about one’s identity undermine relationships? Paul and Eli search for answers in the 2023 film Barbie, Greta Gerwig’s feminist fantasia featuring Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling.
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Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel
Intro
1:05: (Eli) Who are the characters and couples?
3:15: (Paul) 1-minute plot recap
4:30: What is our relationship to this movie?
What the movie gets right
8:00 (Paul) Men pursue romantic relationships more earnestly than women do
Romantic relationships matter more to men than to women review by Dr. Wahring
11:55: (Eli) It’s hard to achieve relationship success if we lack a clear sense of our own identity
Confusion about our own identity predicts relationship dissatisfaction study by Dr. Lewandowski
Identity confusion also predicts our partner’s dissatisfaction study by Dr. Parise
13:55: (Paul) Is “being impressive” an effective strategy for men seeking to attract women?
It’s attractive to need a little help, not to be perfect study by Dr. Teng
17:50: (Eli) A good apology can put the two parties back on the same side
Conflict resolution follows from both amends and forgiveness study by Dr. Hannon
19:15: (Paul) The “friendzone” can be a pathway to romantic success, but only if the friendship part is authentic
The friends-to-lovers pathway study by Dr. Stinson
Number of female friends predicts less hostile sexism study by Dr. Jenkins
22:50: (Paul) Women face steeper penalties than men for behaving in gender-counterstereotypic ways
The Penalties and Rewards for Gender Norm Violations review by Dr. Eareckson
Observers like men (but not women) who work while parenting study by Dr. Neuenswander
24: 05: (Eli) People who don’t prioritize successful romantic relationships are less likely to achieve them
Misconceptions in the movie
25:11: (Eli) The film implies that we must solidify our identity before entering, rather than within, a romantic relationship
We expand our identity through romantic relationships study by Dr. Aron
27:05: (Paul) Ken wants Barbie as a long-term-distance low-commitment casual girlfriend
Men are more oriented toward long-term over short-term relationships study by Dr. Jackson
“Are we ok with this?”
28:30: (Paul) Allan doesn’t fit into this world, which consists of a Barbie/Ken binary
31:25: (Eli) The movie is an essential antidote to the typical rom-com message that men should enact grand romantic gestures
32:40: (Paul) The actual “red pill” is that comfort and authenticity are real
33: 25: (Eli) By turning Barbie Land into an oppressive matriarchy, Gerwig offers a novel perspective on Real World
Relationship Quotes!
35:00: (Eli) The sexist executives at Mattel won’t be happy until Barbie is “back in a box”
35:30: (Paul) Ken wants to spend the night with Barbie, but with no sexual impulse
36:30: (Eli) In you’re going on an adventure, it’s helpful to travel have somebody who’s a professional in “beach”
37:05: (Eli) The only constant is change
What do we wish we knew?
39:10: (Eli) Are there circumstances under which peacocking is an effective mating strategy?
41:15: (Eli) Under what circumstances do we look silly when competing with a same-gender person to achieve romantic success
Stars (1–5): The hosts rate the quality of the movie
Rusbults (1–5): The hosts rate the accuracy of the movie’s ideas about relationships
Eaglys (1–5): The hosts rate the accuracy of the movie’s ideas about gender
Eli’s teenage daughter, Norah, tells us what “Barbie” means to her.
Music by Andrew Fraker and Sons
Artwork by Katie Keil